[-] Minecraft Zearneas suggested:
tell him you don't believe in M
"I can't believe the Church of M still exists," you begin to explain, "it's low brain activity crap no one should waste their time on. No wonder you're religious, though. Searching for actual answers would require you to actually use both your brain cells. I don't understand what you're trying to achieve here. I don't need your gods of the gaps nonsense, I'm an atheist!"
"What's that on your head, then?"
"You couldn't even begin to understand the profound message behind it. Wearing the August Cap as an atheist is the truest expression of self-awareness, with more levels of irony than a simpleton like you could even comprehend. Why am I even trying to explain that to you? What a waste of time."
[-] Star Dust suggested:
Wonder where the cat thing is
You have no idea
[-] tmarks11 suggested:
Release a swarm of termites on your captor then make your escape while he's distracted.
Unfortunately, you don't have any
[-] Kaonicping suggested:
Wait for him to get distracted then reach for the knob on his back and set him to the wrong time
You feel around for a knob but there isn't one. The clock gets what you're trying to do and plays along. His face didn't show the right time in the first place, but good job.
[-] Oh Hey, I'm Alive suggested:
Attempt to distract the clock with friendly banter
[-] Star Dust suggested:
Ask why you are being taken to the Church of M
He's ignoring you
[-] eerr suggested:
He's got enough spinning momentum to become a bowling ball. OPEN THE CHURCH DOOR!
Off you g-
[-] suggested:
Suddenly switch to another character
This is the last straw! Bringing in an arsonist? The Church has been getting away with too much shit lately. Someone needs to put them in their place, and if the police won't do it, damn it, you will!